A new year calls. We take toll of the last. We toss out the things we don’t want. Hold on to the good stuff. And then this magical force beckons. A new start! A new start! We’re all given a chance to wipe the slate clean. It’s sublime.
Long ago I never knew how important the need to wish and share New Year’s feelings were… but today we are privy to everyone’s beautiful thoughts and aspirations. Among the vows to be positive and hope for the amazing, I find myself not feeling exceptionally positive or amazing at all. Which of course is not very cool in our times. Which makes me want to hide away from social media on New Year’s eve and cuddle up with my cat on the couch.
There is nothing wrong with being positive or aiming high. But it’s also okay if you’re feeling mediocre just now. It’s okay if you’re feeling despair. It’s okay to feel whatever you feel. You are okay.
Of course I have aims, of course I look for bright things… but life feels oversimplified in these terms. There is all manner of depth and complexity to this existence. We struggle. We ache. We laugh. We love. And if we’re quiet enough we might even hear the pain of those who have neither the privilege or choice to make grandiose plans to be ‘amazing’ next year.
In my privilege I feel so grateful. Mindful of just how lucky I am. I am celebrating! (quietly in my own way). I am loving the symbolic fresh start. An opportunity to try and try again. And yes, I have hopes and wishes.
May I be better. Better at treating the world. Better at treating myself.
May I never forget the things that got me here. I look back and think: how did I get through? I survived! Another year! I’m alive. You are alive!
And with this precious life may I remember the most important things. To be real. To be kind. And to love as hard as I possibly can.
I wish you well, my friends. Happy New Year.